THURSDAY'S SCRIPT TIP:

SLEDGE HAMMER!


Looks like we are going to get another LETHAL WEAPON movie...

I began losing interest in the LETHAL WEAPON series when director Richard Donner began using a sledgehammer to force his political beliefs down my throat. Even though LETHAL WEAPON 2 had all kinds of anti-apartheid posters and scenes with anti-apartheid protestors, those things fit because the story was about an Ambassador (from South Africa) who was using his diplomatic immunity to get away with murder - amongst other crimes. Still, the posters *everywhere* got to be tiring. When we get to the third or fourth film, and there's this huge poster in the Los Angeles Police Department that says "Fur Is Murder!" well, that's just taking things way too far. Show me the police department that would allow some political poster on their wall! I don't want people to tell me what to think... Even if it's what I already think! Even if he has the exact same opinion as I do, I don't want to hear it! I don't go to the movies to hear sermons. I want to be entertained.

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Wait, aren't we supposed to be making movies that are *about something*? That make some sort of point? Shouldn't we try to make films that change the world? Yes! But we shouldn't ever jump on some soap box and make a speech - our job is to be subtle and slightly subversive. To show instead of telling. To use our stories to *demonstrate* our points so that we never have to come out and say it... let alone make some long-winded political speech or plaster posters with slogans all over the background of a scene.

BLOOD DIAMOND is an amazing movie because it offers both good and bad examples of how to make a political or social point on film. It's almost as if it is two films fighting each other. Director Ed Zwick has never been a subtle director - his Denzel Washington film THE SIEGE is one damned speech after another. In another tip I theorized that this began as a script about Djimon Hounsou's character... but there are no Black African stars in Hollywood (though, I have to tell you - Hounsou *is* a movie star whether Hollywood thinks so or not) - so someone called in the rewrite monkeys to add a white movie star (Leonardo DiCaprio) and a love interest for him (the white guy, not the African guy) played by the always hot Jennifer Connelly and now the story isn't about an African guy in Africa, it's about a white guy and a hot, sexy American journalist and how the two of them solve all of Africa's problems and are really more important than the African guy who the story is about.

So the part of the movie about Hounsou usually does a great job of *demonstrating* its point, while DiCaprio and Connelly trade heavy handed speeches.

The film gets off to a great start, with Hounsou's son about to leave for his first day at school - afraid of leaving his family... even for a few hours. He'd rather hang around with his fisherman father and help mend the nets. They have a great relationship, and a minute later we delve even deeper into their relationship when Dad walks his son home from school and the kid is exploding with joy after learning all kinds of things. Dad is proud... and teases him about keeping him home tomorrow to mend nets with him. Then Hounsou spots a truckload of armed soldiers on the road to his village, and the joking around stops. Hounsou and his son race to the village, where they attempt to rescue his wife and their daughter from the armed men. Very much the same set up as APOCALYPTO - and we feel the same emotional tug as a man's family are put in peril. Because we *experience* the sudden violence and lack of basic safety, it touches us on an emotional level.

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His family escapes, but Hounsou is captured.... and the soldiers prepare to chop off his arms so that he won't be able to fight them. The machete swings up, then... the lead soldier realizes that Hounsou might be of better use in the diamond mines. Where he'll need those arms. So Hounsou is sent to this hell-hole work farm right out of a 1930s chain gang movie. Prisoners who work too slow are punished. Workers who take a break are punished. You can't even take a piss without permission - and then an armed guard stands nearby ready to kill you if you decide to make a run for it. They are digging through a mucky pond for diamonds - it's muddy and awful. One prisoner finds a diamond and tries to hide it... and they shoot him dead. Instead of having someone say, "Don't try to steal a diamond, they'll kill you" it is *demonstrated*. We see what happens. When Hounsou finds a huge diamond, we're on the edge of our seats when he decides to try and hide it from the guards. He buries it - is discovered - and has to fight for his life. All of this during a battle between rebels and soldiers over the diamond mine.

Hounsou escapes with his life, ends up in a city, working as a bellhop. Wondering where his wife and children are...

And that's when smuggler Leonardo DiCaprio and journalist Jennifer Connelly show up, and the speeches begin. She has speeches about the evils of "conflict diamonds" and exploiting a third world country and how the world doesn't care if Africans kill each other as long as American brides can show off their diamond wedding rings. DiCaprio gets to make counter speeches about how diamonds are the only way any of these people can ever escape poverty and... well, who really cares? One of the funniest aspects of this film is that whenever anyone climbs up on a soapbox to give a speech about the evils of smuggling or how the world doesn't care what happens in Africa or... well, there are no shortage of speeches... a carload of rebels skids round the corner firing machine guns that force the speechmaker to dive behind the closest burned out car for cover. After a while, it becomes a game - how long will the speech go on before the car load of rebels skids around the corner?

SPOILERS

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But the film still packs a punch due to the Hounsou story - the scenes where we *experience* the problems in Africa instead of having some white people discuss them. Hounsou's son has been kidnaped and is being trained to become a child soldier. His evolution from bright eyed kid to cold eyed killer is frightening. Though this was handled better in the Argentine movie PAPER DOVE (entirely about child soldiers), this film pulls no punches when it comes to how callous these kids can become. When everyone around you dies, and the world is an endless bloody war, it is easy to become part of that war. One of the characters notes that the word "infantry" comes from the practice of using children to fight wars.

Hounsou's wife and daughter have been taken to a refugee camp, and one of the most powerful scenes in the film has Hounsou arrive at the camp to look for them... and there are a million people in the camp. Thousands of tents. Millions of faces. Impossible to find his family among all of these people! Again - demonstration. When he looks through the chain-link fence at all of the people - looking for faces that he recognizes - we are also looking for his wife and daughter in that sea of people. The number of people displaced and living in tents does more to make us understand than any speech could have.

By using these elements as *part of the story* we experience them. A good screenplay uses the story itself to make its point by putting the characters that we identify with into situations... so that we feel their pain. When Hounsou finally spots his wife and daughter through the chain-link fence, it's a great moment. A big emotional moment.

He's a star

There's also a great scene at an orphanage filled with little children who have been maimed in the war - and a heartbreaking moment with a child whose arms were cut off. Though there's a speech going on in the background, you don't even hear it - the kid gets our full attention.

Later in the story, Hounsou comes upon his soldier son... and the film doesn't pull any punches. That's one of the other things about the film that works well - characters you care about get killed. From DiCaprio's bartender best friend to a kind-hearted school teacher... to characters who get star billing. This is a war movie where it's not just un-named extras who die sudden, violent deaths. Of course, there's one character who manages to get a speech off while they are dying (for about ten minutes). But the film works more often than not - thanks to Hounsou's story thread (and great acting). I wish the film was all about him and left out the DiCaprio and Connelly characters - focusing on the people disrupted by the war, rather than the folks on the sidelines who are really only there to make speeches and make a buck (for all of the Connelly character's self-righteousness - she's making a buck by exposing the evils of blood diamonds.

So gang, to jump up on this soapbox and give you the moral of the story: let your story make your point, and save the speeches for Oscar night... Yikes! Here comes a car load of rebels!


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MOVIES ARE CHARACTERS!

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Expanded version with more ways to create interesting protagonists! A step-by-step guide to creating "take charge" protagonists. Screenplays are about characters in conflict... characters in emotional turmoil... Strong three dimensional protagonists who can find solutions to their problems in 110 pages. But how do you create characters like this? How do you turn words into flesh and blood? Character issues, Knowing Who Is The Boss, Tapping into YOUR fears, The Naked Character, Pulp Friction, Man With A Plan, Character Arcs, Avoiding Cliche People, Deep Characterization, Problem Protagonists, 12 Ways To Create Likable Protagonists (even if they are criminals), Active vs. Reactive, The Third Dimension In Character, Relationships, Ensemble Scripts, and much, much more. Print version is 48 pages, Kindle version is once again around 205 pages!

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Most screenplays are about a 50/50 split between dialogue and description - which means your description is just as important as your dialogue. It just gets less press because the audience never sees it, the same reason why screenwriters get less press than movie stars. But your story will never get to the audience until readers and development executives read your script... so it is a very important factor. Until the movie is made the screenplay is the movie and must be just as exciting as the movie. So how do you make your screenplay exciting to read? Description is important in a novel as well, and the “audience” does read it... how do we write riveting description?

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What is a scene and how many you will need? The difference between scenes and sluglines. Put your scenes on trial for their lives! Using "Jaws" we'll look at beats within a scene. Scene DNA. Creating set pieces and high concept scenes. A famous director talks about creating memorable scenes. 12 ways to create new scenes. Creating unexpected scenes. Use dramatic tension to supercharge your scenes. Plants and payoffs in scenes. Plus transitions and buttons and the all important "flow"... and more! Over 65,000 words! Print version was 48 pages, Kindle version is around 210 pages!

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ACT TWO SOLUTIONS!

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Expanded version with more techniques to help you through the desert of Act Two! Subjects Include: What Is Act Two? Inside Moves, The 2 Ps: Purpose & Pacing, The 4Ds: Dilemma, Denial, Drama and Decision, Momentum, the Two Act Twos, Subplot Prisms, Deadlines, Drive, Levels Of Conflict, Escalation, When Act Two Begins and When Act Two Ends, Scene Order, Bite Sized Pieces, Common Act Two Issues, Plot Devices For Act Two, and dozens of others. Over 67,000 words (that’s well over 200 pages) of tools and techniques to get you through the desert of Act Two alive! Print version was 48 pages, Kindle version is well over 200 pages!

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All About Endings!

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GRAND FINALES Blue Book!

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The First Ten Pages Of Your Screenplay Are Critical,
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Creating the perfect ending to your story! This 100,000 word book shows you how to end your story with a bang, rather than a whimper. Everything from Resolution Order to Act Three Tools to Happy or Sad Endings? to How The Beginning Of Your Story Has Clues To The Ending (in case you were having trouble figuring out how the story should end) to Falling Action to How To Avoid Bad Endings to Writing The Perfect Twist Ending to Setting Up Sequels & Series to Emotional Resolutions to How To Write Post Credit Sequences to Avoiding Deus Ex Machinas, to 20 Different Types Of Ends (and how to write them) and much more! Everything about endings for your screenplay or novel!

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All About LOGLINES, TREATMENTS, and PITCHING!

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LOGLINES, TREATMENTS, and PITCHING! Blue Book!

Distilling Your Screenplay!

Loglines, Treatments, Pitching, Look Books, Pitch Decks, One Pagers, Rip-O-Matics?

You have written a brilliant 110 page screenplay, but how do you get anyone to read it? You need to distill it down into some form of verbal moonshine or story rocket fuel that will ignite that bored development executive or manager or agent and get them to request your screenplay. But how do you shrink those 110 pages into a 25 word logline or a 2 minute elevator pitch or a one page synopsis or a short paragraph? This 100,000 word book shows you how! Everything you need to know! From common logline mistakes (and how to solve them) to how your pitch can reveal story problems to the 4 types of pitches!

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THE BUISINESS SIDE

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Should really be called the BUSINESS BLUE BOOK because it covers almost everything you will need to know for your screenwriting career: from thinking like a producer and learning to speak their language, to query letters and finding a manager or agent, to making connections (at home and in Hollywood) and networking, to the different kinds of meetings you are will have at Studios, to the difference between a producer and a studio, to landing an assignment at that meeting and what is required of you when you are working under contract, to contracts and options and lawyers and... when to run from a deal! Information you can use *now* to move your career forward! It's all here in the Biggest Blue Book yet!

Print version was 48 pages, Kindle version is over 400 pages!

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SECRETS OF ACTION SCREENWRITING

bluebook IT'S BACK! SECRETS OF ACTION SCREENWRITING
Over 460 pages packed with tips and techniques. How to write a plot twist, the four kinds of suspense (and how to create it), reversals, ten ways to invent new action scenes, secrets and lies, creating the ultimate villain, five kinds of love interests, MORE! CLICK HERE!

CLASSES ON MP3

Class MP3s CLASSES ON MP3! Take a class on MP3! GUERRILLA MARKETING - NO AGENT? NO PROBLEM! and WRITING THRILLERS (2 MP3s). Full length classes on MP3. Now Available: IDEAS & CREATIVITY, WRITING HORROR, WRITING INDIE FILMS, more!
Take classes on MP3!

MY OTHER SITES

B MOVIE WORLD
Cult Films, Exploitation, Bikers & Women In Prison, Monster Movies.

FIRST STRIKE PRODUCTIONS
Producing my own scripts, investment possibilities, pipe dreams.

NAKED SCREENWRITING MP3s

Naked Class The NAKED SCREENWRITING CLASS ON MP3! The 2001 London Class on 8 MP3s! Recorded *live* the morning after the Raindance Film Festival wrapped. The two day class on 8CD worth, plus a workbook, plus a bonus CD.
The 2 Day Class on MP3!

ONLINE CLASSES
Furious Action Class
BILL'S CORNER

My nineteen produced films, interviews with me in magazines, several sample scripts, my available scripts list... And MORE!
...............................BILL'S CORNER


Available Scripts

E BOOKS PAGE

bluebook E BOOKS: New Blue Books and Novelettes!
I am expanding all of the Blue Books from around 44 pages of text to around 200 pages! Some are over 250 pages! See what is availabale and what is coming soon!Also, I've been writing Novelletes and there will soon be novels.
E BOOKS: BLUE BOOKS & NOVELLETES

BOOKLETS & PRODUCTS

bluebook FIRST STRIKE BLUE BOOKS
Each Blue Book is 48 pages and focuses on a different aspect of screenwriting. Dialogue. Visual Storytelling. Your First Ten Pages. Act 2 Booster. Protagonists. Great Endings.
Seventeen Blue Books now available!

THE SECRETS OF ACTION SCREENWRITING OUT OF PRINT!