Here’s the Situation…

This is my crew for the weekend.  Holla!  We are gonna splash so much bottled water around the club while we fist pump it will make the average head explode.  I have my gel kit ready for deployment and luckily Pauly D will give me some pointers.  We have a 5:30 lift session at the gym, followed by a protein-rich dinner, then we groom ourselves for 4 hours before hittin’ da club.  I’m hoping to get J-Wow so drunk that she blows Snookie (we all know Snookie has a dick).  I think the highlight of my night will be (fingers crossed) if Ronnie teaches me his “creepy” patented move.  This could potentially be the single-greatest weekend of my life.  Wish me luck.  If anyone needs me, I will undoubtedly be in the club for 48 hours straight so holla at ya jersey Shore boy…